Change of Mind or Change of View?

Have you ever heard the expression “can’t see the forest for the trees”? Most likely you have, but if not, it’s explained as someone being so focused on the small details that they can’t see the bigger picture. I often tend to view things that way, unfortunately. I let the little things affect me and have a hard time letting go to see everything as a whole. When I realize that I’m doing it, I know I need to take a step back.

As you know, I’ve been dealing with quite a bit of change, in both my personal and professional life. Some of the days I’ve woken up feeling strong and ready to take on the day, but the next, just getting up and outside of the apartment has been a struggle. I had three consecutive days where nothing was going right and I felt like I couldn’t catch my breath. Whether I liked it or not, I knew I needed to take a pause. I needed to remove myself from the equation completely in order to truly see and assess the things in my life that have been weighing me down. So, I booked a cabin in Big Bear for a two-day solo getaway to take time for myself to reflect.

I arrived on Tuesday afternoon and the cabin was perfect. Cute, quaint, and all to myself! For those wondering, I stayed at the Pine Knot Guest Ranch just up from The Village. While I was near all the restaurants and shopping, I decided to do my own thing. The first thing I did was unpack, then I left and went for a massage at Altitudes. I’ve been under so much stress that my neck was beyond stiff. My masseuse, Miko, worked wonders though! He implemented hot stones and even acupuncture techniques to help alleviate pressure. After that heavenly experience, I went back and made dinner, then relaxed in bed with a movie before I hit the hay early.

The next day, I went horseback riding at Baldwin Lake Stables! I haven’t ridden a horse in a long, long time. Fun fact: I went to horse camp when I was little, but I was so scared that all I did was play with kittens until the last day. Then I met Angel and fell in love and we had some great rides! In my defense, the first thing I saw was a horse going crazy getting new horseshoes put on. Nevertheless, I am now over my fear and I actually love riding! It was just what I needed too.

The rest of the day, I lounged around again, only this time, you can bet I filled that big jacuzzi tub up for a long soak! But I also took time to sit down and really think about the things that have happened and how I’ve allowed it to linger as long as it has. I’ve been harboring so much negativity from my own stress and insecurities in life that it’s affected me physically, emotionally, and mentally. So I wrote, reflected, and reassessed. I wrote down the things that have happened, reflected on the why, and reassessed how to see things from a different perspective the next time around.

As I drove to Big Bear, I stopped in this same spot. The sun was shining and there wasn’t a cloud in the sky. Then as I started my drive home, I decided I wanted to stop to take some photos. The clouds and fog from the lake were consuming the entire area. For a moment, I was bummed because not only could I not take my photo, but it just wasn’t that big picture view I wanted to see on my way out. But then I said screw it. Rather than only seeing the grey fogginess down below, I looked up and out. The clouds were so beautiful and the breeze felt amazing! Los Angeles air doesn’t compare to the mountains. So, it was then I realized I simply needed to change my perspective and create my own bigger picture.

Am I fixed? Will I now always see the bigger picture rather than focus on one detail of my life? No and no. I’m human, and I’m flawed. But what’s most important is that I know when to take a break or step back so that I don’t dwell on the things going wrong in my life. What’s important is looking at what’s going right and visualize how to bring that into the other areas of your life. It’s not easy, but I’m working on it 🙂

Until next time…stay golden!

xo, Goldielegs